Barkman, Mary Lou (Louise)

Mary Lou has “arrived home” … she has fought the good fight.

On the evening of April 20, 2026, Mary Lou passed away … “Safe in the Arms of Jesus.”  Yes, we deeply grieve the separation death brings but Mary Lou has been released from her suffering.
Maria Luisa Wiebe was born February 13, 1948, in a Roman Catholic convent, in Naumburg, Germany, post World War 2, to Henry and Agnes Wiebe. Eight months later, this young family sponsored by Henry’s uncle, Johann Rempel of Clearbrook, boarded a US troop ship called the SS Marine Tiger.
After a very stormy 10 day voyage across the Atlantic, the SS Marine Tiger docked at Pier 21, in the Port of Halifax. After clearing customs with no problems, the long 6 day trip via train to BC began. On their arrival in Mission, Uncle Johann and Aunt Anna Rempel, their sponsors, were there to greet them. They were given a broken down brooder house by Uncle Johann which with the creativity and resourcefulness of Mary Lou’s parents was turned into a functional living space.
The challenges which Mary Lou’s parents faced brought out the best of their character. While Mary Lou’s parents were picking strawberries and hops, Agnes Funk, Henry’s cousin, took care of Mary Lou. Within a year, Mary Lou‘s dad repaid the travel debt (Reiseschuld) to his Uncle Johann having been in Canada less than a year, Shortly after that they moved to a three room house which felt a lot better.
Two years later, Mary Lou had the pleasure of being introduced to two siblings. On April 16, 1950, Mary Lou welcomed her sister, Luella into her life. and a little better than a year on August 15, 1951, Rudy completed this trio of siblings. Then 2 more brothers, David and Loren completed the family when she was 13 and 17. Which in her words, “were answers to my prayers.” Probably two of her greatest delights growing up were in her words “when the two baby brothers joined our family in my teen years. My sister and I take full credit for raising them.”
When Mary Lou was about 6 years old, the opportunity to purchase a larger home came available when the Abe Funks sold their original small home to Mary Lou‘ s parents. They moved the house to a piece of land off Clearbrook Road and Tims Crescent, which Mary Lou’s parents had bought from dad’s cousin John. In the words of Dad, “It was tiny, but it was our home. We experienced happy times there with our children. There was forest next to our property, and the children liked to play there.”  If this 3 room cabin could talk it would hold you spell bound recounting all the adventure and life experiences Mary Lou and her siblings had growing up on this property. It holds many precious memories.  Nine of her growing up years was spent with her family in this three room cabin. 
Mary Lou’s dad being a carpenter, embarked on building an attractive family home adjacent to the “cabin” in the evenings after work and on Saturdays. Mary Lou and Luella were the first occupants of the new home. The last home Mary Lou lived in between working (Post MEI) and going to UBC was on Grandview Crescent.
Mary Lou's father instilled a strong work ethic in Mary Lou and her siblings. Her dad being a carpenter and in her words, “part farmer:” built a barn to house 2000 chickens mainly so his kids would learn to work. In Mary Lou’s words, “We weren't so thrilled but certainly appreciate his thinking now.” When the chicken operation came to a close, the family’s employment centred around working in the fields in the Sumas flats planting vegetable crops, hoeing and weeding, picking strawberries and raspberries, in the hot sun.
Butt the Wiebe family was not all work and no play. They knew how to have fun and celebrate.
Mary Lou writes: “Some of my biggest delight growing up were visiting and playing with my second cousins whose families took us in as if we were part of their immediate family. The trips we took were highlights: two to Winnipeg one by car and one by train to visit relatives. We loved the weekend trips to Jasper, Banff, and once in a while Osoyos, as well our traditional yearly outing to Stanley Park, Harrison Hot Springs, Mount Baker and Keremeos on Thanksgiving Monday where we would to load up our station wagon with apples for the winter. Dad loved games and sports, so our family spent many evenings playing table games, pool, softball or tennis. Once we got married, we continued these family gatherings as spouses and grandchildren were added to the mix. Such wonderful memories that we cherish and delight in!
During the 60’s many a Friday night saw the Wiebe Dodge station (before seat belt became mandatory) packed with 8 to 10 bodies going to the MEI/Abbey Secondary basketball rivalry match. One of the outstanding MEI players at that time was Mary Lou’s brother Rudy. In the summertime the family enjoyed watching Rudy giftedness as an outstanding fastball pitcher
Mary Lou loved reading. She remembers: “when I was younger, I would wake up early, even though it often was not light enough to read.” She taught her younger sister Luella to read which really frustrated Luella’s teacher not knowing what to do with her. She continued in that vein and taught her own children that skill and love of reading.
Mary Lou committed to give her life to Christ at the age of 8. She was 16 when she was baptized together with her sister Luella and 38 other young people. There had been a time of revival at MEI where she attended. Many young peoples’ lives were permanently turned around. It was an exciting time.
Mary Lou attended MEI from grade seven to grade 13(1967) when it was phased out. Mary Lou’s diligence as a student was recognized as she was awarded the alumni scholarship and chosen as one of two students as co-valedictorians with her presenting her speech in German during the 1966 MEI graduation ceremonies. (46 grads). 
Now we move on to Post high school years. Following high school Mary Lou attended one year at Columbia Bible College. The next stop was UBC where Mary Lou was enrolled in the education program. On the weekends, Luella and Mary Lou would come home and participate in church activity. It was also at this time while she was attending university that she taught German school on Saturdays to help to defray the cost of her education. She was awarded her Bachelor of Education degree in the fall of 1972.
1971 was a pivotal year for Mary Lou. Some context would be helpful. Mary Lou's sister Luella and Ron's sister Darlene met at and attended Columbia Bible College together and then decided to room together in Vancouver while going to school there the next year. Mary Lou was living in Vancouver and got to know Ron's sister there. In Mary Lou’s words “Our sisters decided to play the role of matchmaking.” Ron had flown in from Saskatoon during the Easter break to look for a teaching job in BC. Job interviews would take place the following week. During this time Mary Lou and I saw our first movie together, “Lawrence of Arabia” with sisters, Luella and Darlene chaperoning.
With the interviews completed, Ron was offered a job in Quesnel. Mary Lou had made an indelible impression on Ron's heart. Letters were exchanged. Ron found out that Camp Stillwood then known as Columbia Bible Camp was looking for volunteer workers. That appealed to Ron since it would enable him to further cultivate his relationship with Mary Lou on weekends while she was attending summer school at UBC. It didn't take too long and Ron proposed to Mary Lou. They were engaged on the Thanksgiving weekend of 1971 and married the following spring in the Clearbrook Mennonite Brethren Church on April 1, 1972.
Following the honeymoon, Mary Lou joined Ron as they started their life together in Quesnel. Mary Lou had three months to get our apartment in order and was anticipating starting her teaching career. When September arrived and classes started it was soon apparent that from Mary Lou’s perspective, the classroom was not an environment she was comfortable with. She resigned from that position and then started to work at the local credit union.
In 1973 Ron resigned his teaching position in Quesnel and accepted a teaching position at Como Lake Junior High School as the music teacher. They found a comfortable 2 bedroom apartment just north of Lougheed Mall. Mary Lou worked in the office at the PetroCan facility on the Barnett Hwy in Port Moody. It was during this time that Mary Lou became pregnant with Kristin. 
In the 54 years of marriage the Barkman family has lived in Quesnel, Coquitlam, New Westminster, Surrey, Langley and Abbotsford. Our daughter Kristin was born on March 15, 1975, in Royal Columbian Hospital. Three years later our son Jeremy was born on May 16, 1978 at the Surrey Memorial Hospital.
As our children were approaching school age, we had become aware of the merits of educating our children at home. As we researched and prayed, we connected with like minded families to embark on this adventure. This was in the early 1980s and homeschooling was very much a concept that did not have much traction in the general public or people in the church.
Mary Lou loved the role of homemaker and mother.  She made our home a welcoming place for kids in the neighbourhood. There were also many times when we would have other children in our home on weekends when couples wanted to have a getaway. Mary Lou loved that.  We welcomed the opportunity to have our young nephews and nieces at our place to get to know them.
Mary Lou loved to celebrate birthdays and special occasions. She was so creative in making special birthday cakes for children. She loved making cards and scrapbooking. We have at least 20 photo albums that span a time period between 1975 to 2000 that document our family’s history in picture form all to the credit of Mary Lou.
She was a great host. During Expo 86 we turned our home into a bed-and-breakfast and hosted between two and three dozen families from across the United States and Canada. It was a great experience!
It was on June 26, 1994, that Mary Lou was involved in a minor car accident, which did not turn out to be all that minor. It marked the beginning, for the most part of life, that was confined to her wheelchair for the next 30 years plus. It prevented her from being active as a homemaker, and she found herself much more dependent on her family to deal with areas where she was not able to exercise certain tasks or activities.
Our relationship as a couple and family have been deeply impacted by the relationships that we have formed within the different church bodies we have in a part of. In the 50 years that we have lived in the lower mainland Willingdon Church, Cornerstone Community Church, Mountainview Alliance and now Rose of Sharon Baptist Church have been a wonderful source of encouragement and support to our family.
Mary Lou loved going away on special weekends or retreats that focused on enriching our marriage or learning more about being effective parents. Mary Lou aspired to learn more and apply to be the best person she could be. She has left us a legacy of her thoughts and experiences of how she experienced life as a child and an adult that are too numerous to include in this tribute
She was not a flashy personality, but she had a warm engaging persona that you were drawn to. She deeply loved her Lord, her family and the body of Christ. We will never be able to fully appreciate what she brought to us as a family and as individuals.
Starting seven years ago in 2020, the cruel tentacles of dementia started to reveal itself in Mary Lou’s life in a more pronounced way. We observed Mary Lou’s diminishing abilities to communicate, to use her hands, to walk.  In spite of this, she was able to communicate her feelings and emotions via her face, that clearly indicated that she was connecting with us.
The last years, and particularly the last two years have taught us what it means to sacrifice on behalf of those who cannot help themselves. It has been a delight to come alongside Mary Lou and honour her and encourage her the best way we knew.
We have been so blessed by the wonderful care that Mary Lou received at Maplewood House. Maplewood House became our second family as we were introduced to a loving and caring setting where we experienced care aides, LPNs, RNs, maintenance, kitchen and administrative personnel all contributing to Mary Lou’s wellbeing plus connections with other caregivers who had loved ones in Maplewood. Thank you Dr. Sarah Pawlovich for helping us navigate the final days with Mary Lou with your wisdom and compassion.
Mary Lou loved to travel. Although we didn’t get to travel internationally (Mary Lou would have loved to visit her place of birth) we had the opportunity to attend a good number of family cousin gatherings in the prairies, Victoria, and California and Hawaii when Kristin was a year and a half old.
But on April 20, 2026, my dear wife Mary Lou, dearest companion of 54 years and 20 days, left solo, on her ultimate trip, leaving her earthly home for the one Jesus had prepared for her. She has just experienced the trip of her life. We wait to join her.
Mary Lou is buried in the Abbotsford, BC Mount Lehman cemetery. She is predeceased by her father Henry, her mother Agnes and her brother Rudy.  She is survived by her husband of 54 years Ron Barkman, her daughter Kristin, her son Jeremy, her sister Luella Neufeld (David), her brothers David Wiebe (Lesley) Loren Wiebe (Heather) her sister in law Hilda Wiebe (Rudy) her sister in law Darlene Lind (Ron) her brother in law Lester Barkman (Elaine) and dozens of nieces, nephews and great nieces and nephews.
Mary Lou’s Celebration of Life will take place at the
Rose of Sharon Baptist Church
26245 - 28th Avenue ​
Aldergrove, BC
June 28, 2026  Sunday at 2:00 PM
NOTE: The service with be live streamed on the Rose of Sharon YouTube Channel www.rosbc.com